Transitioning

Transitions are always hard, but they're a necessary part of my life right now. I'm a nomad; movement is my way of life. Endings are sad but new beginnings are terrifyingly exciting: there's no other rush like knowing that in a few days you're moving to a new place, with no idea about where you'll be laying your head but a foolish faith that it'll all work out the way it's supposed to, and that in a few months or weeks it'll all be settled and you'll look back and laugh. I try not to worry and stress too much about things I have no control over, but that's easier said than done (don't think about the pink elephant in the room).

A few nights ago I went to my 10 year high school reunion. It went exactly as expected: I saw people I had given nary a thought to for a decade, I didn't see people I'd wished would have been there, I felt good about my life path and choices, and grateful for my blessings: my life and my health. Disappointed there weren't any fist fights or dancing.

Before that I was in Reno for a few days. It was nice to see Lyndsey Bunn, an old friend who is living exactly the fierce life I would have expected. We picked up as if it hadn't been five or so years since we'd last seen each other. My brother, dad and I hung out all together for the first time in ages as well. Family is who you're from, family is what it is. I'm realizing that I can't have expectations, and when I don't, great things can happen. We had a supreme time hanging out, eating a buffet, swimming in Lake Tahoe, and watching the History channel. Who knows when that'll happen again?

I'm glad to be 'home' in Portland for a spell, though it's not really where I live, so can I really call it home? My mom's PO box (what I use as my 'permanent' address for school and forms and stuff) is now in Washington, and I just lived in California for 2 months and in 8 days I'm moving to DC for school. Can't I just be a resident of where my heart is? Then let's just say I'm a resident of the west coast.

This sojourn in Portland is/will be perfect: seeing old friends, the good people in my life who renew my faith in humanity, the world and myself. Touching and hugging people for the last time in awhile. Getting errands done (this morning has been incredibly productive: sorted out bank account stuff, made plans for the rest of the week, applied for an internship), and doing enough for myself and my future to calm my nerves and try to just relax and have fun.

Thank you thank you milles fois merci to all the fabulous people in my life whom I can't begin to adequately show my appreciation.

My summer in images

Usually I'm a writer, but here are images from my phone (from my phone! blogs are getting so fancy these days, how can I keep up?) of what I've been up to in Santa Cruz this summer. This is just a taste of what I've been up to. I'm going to miss this place, but everyone's gotta get serious and grow up and save the world at some point, right?

view from Riva's on the wharf:

lunch with Madeleine:

Walking and being with Steve:

Being in the forest:

With Madeleine:

This is too small to do it justice:

This happens on the regular:

Mime party:

Daily:

This is near us:

Puyerh (I mutilated that spelling, but it's sure good relaxing tea):

This one:

Intergalactic Barbie weddings. And wine:

Family and Life

Living in Santa Cruz for just a few weeks. Getting back into 'the good life' (family, Californian wine, running, yoga-ing, the ocean, Steve, the trials and tribulations of a privileged liberal community), and trying to be awake to what the universe has to teach me in my life in this moment, right now. Being reminded of what was important, what is important, what should be important.

Gun violence makes me so angry. The Keystone pipeline (remember I've been in Africa for 2 years so some stuff that is tired for you is still new to me). WTF? I read a little thing in the May 27, 2013 New Yorker (did I list reading The New Yorker up there in my definition of the good life? Well, please consider it edited in) about the terrible Keystone pipeline and for me it all boils down to one simple question:

how much oil would I personally have to commit not to use in the next year in order for Obama to say 'hell no!' to the pipeline?

It seems like a pretty 'simple' math problem to me (economist and math friends, help a sister out here). How much (of the worst kind of) oil would the pipeline bring us? Divide that by the number of Americans (or number of adult Americans? or number of car-owning Americans?) to figure out what each of our personal liability is. I'm thinking it wouldn't be all that much. Like, we each commit to make one less car trip a week. To ride our bike more.

Let's save the environment and our own hearts, let's bike!!

...I've definitely been hanging out with community college bike co-op-erators a lot lately, but too much? Nah, can you have too much of a good thing?

But seriously, let's kick this addiction to oil, be it foreign, domestic, north American, or whatever. Oll is oll, no matter where it comes from. And let's stop this gun violence. And let's make the world a better place. For everyone. White, black, rich, poor, American, African, otherwise. It seems like a lot, and it is overwhelming, but the day we get numb to it all and stop caring, that's a scary day indeed.

Santa Cruz summer to-do list:

• Bigfoot museum
• ride bikes downtown
• Lean In book club
• medieval feast
• Africa presentations
• see Steve multiple times per week
• find trivia
• Shakespeare Santa Cruz
• LA trip?
• run
• yoga
• read
• read some more

Triathlon & Steve, my life as of August

O.M.G. I am officially a "triathlete" as today, I completed my first-ever triathlon, something I've been dreaming about for years. It was awesome, chafing and slight sunburn and wanting to die and all! The Sandman Triathlon in Aptos, CA included a .5 mile ocean swim, a 15 mile "moderate" bike ride, and a 4.2 mile run on the beach, a.k.a. sand, a.k.a. hard. I'm more exhausted than maybe I've ever been, but it is good, so good. I finished in about 2 hours and 14 minutes, which is faster than what I was expected (though admittedly, I didn't know what to expect). I was pretty slow, but not the slowest. (I kicked the swim, though: 22 minutes)! I felt like I belonged. And I want to do more! Then we saw dolphins...how cool is that? I'm super proud right now, if you couldn't tell!

A balanced life is a happy life. A balanced life includes work and play, exercise and reading of books, wine (and margaritas!) and good food. At the beach. Surrounded by good friends and family. What more can we ask for?

A good day (last week) in the life of me: went to work (blah), Steve picked me up (my new friend who will be teaching 15 miles away from me in France, what what!), and then we went to El Palomar, downtown Santa Cruz, and promptly downed 2 pitchers of margaritas before catching the matinee showing of Mamma Mia! (accompanied by a gaggle of middle-aged moms), complete with a $5 medium coke which we drank down a bit and then filled with rum I had in my purse (we're such badasses)! We gorged ourselves on snacks from the Jelly Belly store (also snuck-in contraband) while singing our hearts out to ABBA, then went out to coffee afterwards (after discovering that American Apparel is not limited to freaky ads on facebook, but also has actual store locations, buying a cute pair of sunglasses at some other store, and having Steve talk me out of buying a necklace I didn't need), while making all sorts of evil plans about what and who we're going to do while in France together. Then we came home and had delicious crockpot food prepared by my aunt and continued drinking (wine) as we played the piano and sang together.

A perfect day, no?

It's a charmed life, but somebody's got to lead it!

Life is almost too good to be true at the moment. It feels like I'm due for a really big disaster here soon. Please, loved ones: don't get yourselves hit by buses, and make sure you survive any and all hostage situations of which you find yourselves on the wrong end. Here is a sampling of the things I have been doing and learning here in sunny California (because I love lists):

• how to drive stick shift. I've driven over 200 miles in the last 2 weeks on the thing. Go me! I'm still figuring out gears and hills, and I still stall every now and again (to remind myself that I'm human), but all in all, I'd say I am now competent at driving standard cars!
• where to shop. specifically, for wine. I went to Safeway (because I just found out that a US Bank is inside! this is big news because previously I had thought the nearest one was up in the bay area...boo), and they were charging $6, $7 for a bottle of Barefoot! As if! So I spent $10 on food (for me and the cats) there, and $20 on 6 bottles of wine at Trader Joe's. 3 bottles of 2-buck-chuck (Charles Shaw), and 3 other reasonably priced bottles ($4-$6). yeah!
• i have also been hosting BBQs, going out dancing, hanging out with Hannah (SO fun! I think reunions are in order every so often, wherever we are in the world...it's healthy for my soul to be with her and laugh at other people, making each other feel good that we're us, and not them, ugh!), and watching great movies. The Lost Boys, filmed in the 80's in Santa Cruz, featuring Keifer Sutherland, is actually not half bad. But Corey Feldman, with a crazy deep voice, really took the cake in the film. Hannah and I watched the movie and then went to the Boardwalk later in the week...we rode this ride where it's like you're in a hang-glider and I felt like a vampire: flying above the boardwalk and swooping down on unsuspecting citizens...I couldn't stop cracking up. We also saw: the Monterey Bay Aquarium. Conclusion: I still love oceans! They (and the creatures in them) are so grand! Screaming kids and crying babies, not so much.

I have also been trying to keep up with my reading. The New Yorker, Entertainment Weekly, and currently The Road by Cormac McCarthy are keeping my occupied and informed...The Road is definitely going to make a sweet film with Viggo Mortensen. That's all. I'll end with this: don't be jealous, just come visit!

Employed

I have a job, as of yesterday! It's a dream job: a little silver shop down in Capitola Village (read: tourist central). I can ride my bike to work (downhill, mostly), and it's easy, the coworkers are great, and the customers are nice, for the most part. I get a 70% discount on everything in the store, which is going to be a challenge, but I just have to chant to myself: "saving for France! saving for France! saving for France!" and I hope that can work.

Why is it that when I'm unemployed I'm stressed about not having a job, but that once I get one...I'm working! This is going to be nothing but chill, though: the nicest bosses in the world, the easiest gig, in the sunniest place. The biggest challenge is going to be keeping hydrated on the bike commute!

Last night we had a party for the biology department faculty of the college my aunt works for. These people were great...apart from the fact that they feel some affinity for science...ew! They do have a penchant for travel, and I heard some great stories about Cameroon, Johannesburg and Harare. One guy was even from France, and I was stoked to tell him I'm going there in a few short months! Some lab tech even gave me his number. He was the only other unmarried person at the party over the age of 15, so it's not like it was some great feat on my part or anything. For many reasons, I threw it away today. Nice gesture though, I guess?

Apparently I'm the unhappy owner of 3 credit cards right now. That sucks.

My brother is going to Iraq in less than a month now, I guess. I'm going to see him in a week and a half. It's weird, but ever since he joined the army a year ago now, "family member of military" has become a huge part of my identity. How could it not?

To relax is a challenge. There is so much I want to read and do and be!

The first week

In a new place. Santa Cruz, (and Soquel, and Capitola, and Watsonville, I suppose, to be more exact) is amazing. This first week has been a whirlwind, involving a bladder infection, a drive down with the mom and a great cousin, a birthday party for my aunt, grading anatomy papers, good god!, turning in a job application, watching my aunt take the brain out of a cadaver, hanging out with Reid and Madeleine, reading a weird book about the end of the world, watching the first half of the 6 hour Pride & Prej (the good one, with Colin Firth), finally going to the beach, joining the gym, and beginning the arduous task of learning how to drive stick shift. Oh yes, and finding out that I'm going to the Aix-Marseille region in France next year, which was both amazing and my first choice. WOW! I've been busy, and waking up early, but loving life, and I only plan on it getting better! My aunt and I will sign up for a triathlon and start training for it. I will find a job...somewhere! I will continue reading and edifying myself, and perhaps even learn to prepare a few meals for myself here and there.

Becoming a better person. Everyday.