This summer I have been content to lead a provincial life, knowing that adventure lies on my horizon. I ride my bike one mile to work almost every day, and the only people I see with real consistency are my family and my coworkers. I guess my little life is clearly evidenced in the fact that my two current crushes are the guy who works at the local liquor store and the "middle-aged" (late 30's? mid 40's? the family is not agreed) checker at the grocery store. As Uncle Jeff so sagely points out, he gets benefits!
Thankfully, to this mundanity came Alisha and Phil to the rescue! They promptly whisked me off to the big city, where my eyes were opened to the wonders of a cosmopolitan lifestyle. First, we visited Berkeley, a trendy urban campus full of forward-thinking hipsters, and tree-sitters. Then we went to Union Square, to traipse around in Neiman Marcus ogling the gowns and shoes and pretending that we belonged there. As I was half-heartedly perusing the scents (since I don't have one, and feel I should if I'm going to be hanging out in France), I somehow got caught by a pretty young woman who informed me that Chanel was giving free makeovers that day and that someone was here from France for the occasion. After making sure there was room for Alisha too, I was on board. It was an exercise in humility. The Chanel woman helping me and the products she rubbed onto my face made me feel simultaneously glamorous and hideous. I was better off than Alisha though, who got a lecture from the Frenchman about skincare. He told her he'd have to start at the beginning. "This...this is makeup" he informed her. She was finished before me, and decided she would buy the bronzer. Unfortunately, her money was no good there. Neiman Marcus only takes American Express, the Neiman Marcus credit card, or cash. No lowly Visa or Mastercard for them. I guess it's not everywhere we want to be...
Looking fierce, we headed to H&M and each bought a shirt to wear out for the evening. We headed to the Castro district, which took three times as long as it should have thanks to poor city planning and our lack of a map. Phil called his friend who was from San Francisco but who was in Corvallis at the time, and with her help, we were able to get on the right street (who needs an iPhone when you've got friends?). We parked on a side street and got dressed in the car. We went to a Thai restaurant called Nirvana for dinner, where we spent entirely too much money on delicious cocktails. We traipsed around for awhile, before Phil called Jerred to get the address to a club he'd heard of, Badlands. After making our way past the hermaphrodite dancing around in a little bathing suit on the corner, we found the club, and gratefully stumble inside, only to run into...the Frenchman who did our makeup at Neiman Marcus!!! Uncle Jeff was astounded that in such a large city we would run into the same person twice, but actually, when you do the math (vivacious international make-up artist + notorious gay bar), it's a no-brainer. It was awesome, and he and I are facebook friends now! A Chanel makeup artist is always a good person to have in your coterie, for partying in Paris or at the very least, free samples!
It was a great day...I always have a great time in San Francisco. I'll have to keep that in mind when I'm looking to "settle down somewhere," if I ever get that urge (haven't yet)! Until then, I'll keep busy by flirting with grocery store checkers (last night we discussed the alcohol content of rum...Sailor Jerry's at 46% is the more economical choice than Captain Morgan's, at 35% alcohol...I think he was impressed) and befriending international badasses. And rocking out at karaoke bars with Aunt Robin. Definitely one of the raddest times I've ever had, and hopefully an encore will be in order next week!
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